Gone
by CocaCola Gold
Summary: “Max, you really are completely clueless, aren’t you?” T for language
1. He's Gone

Gone

-

"What the FUCK do you mean 'I'm gonna go'? You planning a fucking vacation from me? From _us_? What the hell, Fang?!" I was so angry I could barely see through my eyes; the whole room was blurry.

"Max, Angel and Nudge will he-"

"I don't give a _fuck_ about them right now! What's _wrong_ with you?!" I picked up the alarm clock on the bedside table and threw it at him, hard. He dodged. "What- you think 'cause we're not _fucking_ you can just _walk away_?!"

Okay, back up. I know for a fact I had never been this angry before, so there may be some well-formed confusion on the matter. There's a good explanation for all of this, believe me. Or, as good as there ever is in Max World.

All right, starting from the beginning, sort of, back when we had just finished saving the world and stuff. Ah, simpler times. We all decided it was high time to find our place in the world, ie, a home where we wouldn't be pegged as 'circus freaks' or 'super heroes'. Flattering as it was, it just wasn't us. So we settled for LA, temporarily, at least. What can I say? It was the sunshine that drew us. That, and the flock really loved the idea of meeting movie stars.

We ended up renting a low-budget apartment with help on the lease from anonymous yet good-willed e-mailing benefactors. I got a job at a rock-climbing place and Fang in a surf shop. Angel and Gazzy had been having fun running around at Billy's Water World. Without man-wolves, I figured that the kids could take on anything since wolly-mammoths hit the dust. Or ice, as it were.

Nudge found her calling working at a local ice-cream shop and finally getting flirty with the local beach bums. This annoyed me enough, Fang some, and, oddly, Iggy a great deal more than I would have suspected. Iggy, who had taken rather quickly to skateboarding, was the first blind contender set to skate in some stupidly-named contest at the end of August, after which we were all set to enter school again, much the flock's dismay.

After the kiss in the cave, Fang and I were just friends. Again. Anyway, few weeks back, he came up to me. "What's the deal? I mean, with us?"

I walked out on him. Guess I shouldn't have done that. Since then, it had been strained between us. After that little incident, he had taken to be seen on various beaches with various blonde-haired, brown-eyed _tramps_. Though I suppose they might have objected to being called such. They were typical surfer-babes, never actually having set foot on a board, but having slept with enough surfers to claim secondhand surfing as a steady hobby. Since then, for some _odd_ reason, I had been in a foul mood. Maybe it was PMS. Maybe it was the constantly warm weather. Maybe it was the Hellmouth trying to tell me I was the new slayer. Whatever it was, I was damn irritable.

But, in any case, the happiness of the flock had finally been established; the elder among us had found working, paying jobs, and all the shit of the past seemed finally to have passed us over. Life was good. By comparison, anyway.

But no. No, life could not have been that easy. Now it hit me, sorry, it hit _us_ like a fucking tidal wave.

"What the FUCK do you mean 'I'm gonna go'?"

Oh, sorry, already been through the part. Here we go. "'cause we're not _fucking_ you can just _walk away_?!"

"No, Max, calm down..." he began towards me, hands up defensively.

"Fuck you, asshole!" I stormed towards him; he was blocking the door. He knew this. He grabbed my arms to keep me back. No way, José, I was helluvalot stronger than _he_ was. I shoved hard against his hands as he held my forearms tight in his grasp. "Let go of me! If you wanna walk out on us, do it! Leave me the fuck outta it!" I shrieked, by now mildly hoping that Angel and Nudge were not, in fact, in the apartment. I didn't think they were.

"Max, I just can't do this anymore!" He yelled back at me, his face contoured with fury, his eyes and brow pressing through clear hurt. "I can't fucking live like this!"

"Like what?" I had stopped struggling some. He threw me backwards.

"Finally! She _listens_ to me!" He gave a half-laugh, mocking like I had never seen him. He crossed the room so I had to turn to face him as he paced, head down, running his hands through his dark hair. His face jerked up, eyes piercing mine. "Max, you don't _listen_ to me. You don't _pay attention_ when I need it. You have no ability to _understand_ what I'm going through. Sure," he gestured, "you know Angel, and Nudge, and Gazzy and Iggy-" he made a violent hand motion, now yelling, "but when it comes to me, your self-proclaimed, 'best friend'," his voice dropped back down to a whisper as his eyes bore into mine once again, "you just _don't care_."

I was in shock. And that was not easy for me- the last time I was in shock was when I discovered my mortal enemy was actually my brother. It's pretty hard to top that. But, not caring? Not _listening_? I _always_ listened, to everyone! It was _me_ that didn't get enough me-time.

"Fang, if anyone doesn't get enough people to listen to them, it's _me_." I had moved a few feet from the door, still standing across the room from him.

"No, Max, I listen to you. Whenever you want, I'm there." He shook his head, demeaningly. I didn't much like it.

I cut him off from his train-of-thought. "Well, I've never _not_ listened to you- you just don't talk." I dismissed his anger.

"Max- you don't _ask_." His face had actually broken out into a terrible, pitying smile, like a last, despondent attempt at something. At me, maybe. "To keep a relationship- a _friend_ship alive, you need to _care_, or at least act like you do. You've forgotten that, I think. And that's barely the half of it..." he mumbled, pushing up to me to get out the door.

"Wait a minute." I pressed hard against his chest, not allowing him to leave just yet. "What do you mean, 'barely the half of it'?" My face showed obvious confusion, I knew, but he just laughed at me. "_What_?"I shot back.

"Max, you really are completely clueless, aren't you?"

I just stared at him, my hands still pressed up against his chest. He dipped down to my face and kissed me. Long, and desperate, feeling like everything in the world was about to fail, and this was all we had, all and forever, and I was okay with that. Then, he pushed passed me and left. "Goodbye, Max." I heard him murmur on his way out. I didn't know what to say. I know I should have said something. But I didn't.

-


	2. I Talk to Ghosts

Gone

_I think this will be three-part… If there is a positive response, I guess. But yeah. The next one will be funnier._

-

Being alone is okay. Being alone and knowing you don't have to be alone is hell. It was like this aching, a craving I couldn't get rid of, and believe me, I _tried_. Every day at the rock-climbing wall I would flirt back with the guys who eyed me. But they weren't what I wanted. None of them were. I knew what I wanted. And I had no idea where it- where _he_, even was.

I am such an idiot. God, it took me, let's see, my entire freaking _life_ to figure that out. And now it's too late.

I reclined back on the wooden planks of the boardwalk. Everyone was gone at three in the morning on a Tuesday. I couldn't sleep. I hadn't been sleeping a lot lately. And not for a good, cardiovascular reason.

Okay, I'm babbling again. Back up once again. I may seem like I'm rambling, but I'm really not, I just need to work on my introductions. The flock- er, the kids are all in bed now. They're old enough to stay alone now. How long's it been? Well... I'm eighteen now. A year and a half? Two years? And I'm alone. Alone after all the shit I've been through. _We've_ been through. Right, 'we've'. Gotten selfish since saving the world's over. Ironic, huh?

I laughed. Must've sounded crazy. Yeah, to the waves and gulls and street lamps that were all listening attentively. I should...

"You've been gone awhile now, Fang. I guess you knew that. We all... We all miss you." I dropped my head. I didn't even fucking care if I sounded fucking crazy. No one could hear me. "Yeah, we're all doing well. We're all in school now... Well, this'll be my last year, I'm a senior, like you would be." I smiled up at the sky. "It's gonna be nice, being a senior, gonna apply to colleges soon, set a good example, you know, 'cause I'm Miss Education over here. Geez, I sound insane, talking to..."

I dropped to the sand of the beach, wandering towards the cold, dark water. "Iggy's been doing well... He's still into skateboarding, he's pretty amazing at it, too. Everyone's gotten over the awe of him being blind; now they're just amazed at how well he can skate. Nudge..." I smiled as I walked in the shallow water. "Nudge can't keep her hands, or eyes, off the boys. And they can't keep their's off her. Don't worry though, she knows right from sex. And Gazzy, well, he and his friends run wild through the streets. I'm so proud, the police have brought him back twice for 'trespassing'. It's cute, Fang, it really is. He's a good kid. And Angel..." I bent down to pick up a rock, skipping it across the calm, black ocean. "She glows. It's like watching a real, earth-bound Angel; modeling agencies breathe down her neck when we go to the mall. And she's nine, only nine. She's gonna be the next Helen of Troy, you just watch."

I kept walking in the dark, my legs to my knees soaked as I paced in the cold water. "They miss you, Fang. They want you to come back. Iggy especially, he used to ask all the time, 'when's Fang getting back?'. I think he's about given up, now. But whatever, right?" I smiled bitterly into the darkness. "I mean, fuck 'em! It's only the family you've grown up with- the ones you've raised, the ones that have raised you! Why care about _that_?" I ran my fingers roughly through my hair, pulling out loose strands and letting them go in the wind. I tucked my hair behind my ear.

"Maybe I didn't listen to you, so maybe you were justified going off, like some kind of wounded puppy. Well, wherever you are, off romancing wealth and fame, I hope you're happy. I hope you're damn pleased with yourself- you deserve it all."

I had all intentions of stopping there, but the words just had built up and now came rolling out. "Damn it- Fang- I miss you! They miss you, but _I_ miss you more! Why did you leave!" I yelled into the wind, standing and clutching the bottom of my shirt, "it's not fair! I loved you!"

My hand flew to my mouth. Word-vomit. I don't know what I was scared of- I was on a vacant beach, alone with the water. My life isn't a movie- there aren't camera's everywhere. Remember that. I continued to walk.

"God, I did. I still do. This isn't your fault, is it? It's... It's mine." I whispered the words, my eyes squinting shut to prevent tears from spilling down. Too late. Before I knew it, I was crying, on a beach. God, how _lame_ was I? How _cliché_? "You left because... Because I was so damn selfish. Because I was so _damn_ terrible."

I guess I secretly hoped that Fang might just _pop_ out of no where and tell me everything was going to be okay. Well, life just wasn't like that. Not my life, anyway. But I had made up my mind. I was going to find him. Somehow, I was going to. Now, maybe this wasn't the job for an average, eighteen-year-old kid. But I don't think I need remind you, I am not some average, eighteen-year-old kid. I am Maximum Ride.

-


	3. Never Incognito

Gone

-

Apparently, incognito means, '(of a person) having one's true identity concealed'. This basically means, 'to everyone besides highly trained and professional bird-kids'. Still, it took _far_ too long to locate the son-of-a-bitch, even _with_ Nudge working the computer and me feeding her Diet Cokes, but three weeks later I was flying (alone) towards San Francisco. Using my wings again for a long period of time had taken some getting back into shape, but it felt good when I did. I pitied the fools who waited in line to check baggage for their flights- Maximum Ride checks no baggage. Maximum Ride _has_ no baggage. Okay, maybe that's a _slight_ overstatement.

I swooped over some low-rise roofs like nobody's business, hitting the back alley running. I took the crumpled paper from my pocket and read the scribbled handwriting. I barely could. Last time I let a _blind_ guy scribe for me, even _if_ he claims he has the fastest shorthand in L.A.

I tucked my wings carefully into my shirt, putting my windbreaker on over them, then began out into the semi-busy street. The address was several blocks away. And by several, I meant fifteen. But if life were easy... Well, wouldn't _that_ be nice.

Reaching the nice apartment complex, I almost banged on the front gate. I laughed at myself. Phew- been awhile since I had actually done anything worth _doing_, and it showed. I moved over to the bushes and climbed then jumped the gate. Maximum Ride, upstanding citizen.

Making my way up the apartment 134B I noticed the red carpets in the halls and white walls with actual paintings on them. Well, _he_ certainly wasn't struggling with finances.

I hit 134B. All the way here I had imaged this moment, and this feeling. The feeling of doubt and fear. And yet no feeling now- I slammed on the door with my fists. Nothing happened. I slammed again. I heard a grunt, a thump, then someone walked to the door and opened it.

Some blonde with roots and a professional dye-job answered the door, mascara running off her eyes and too tan to be a real, honest-to-God human. God just didn't make us that color. He didn't make us _orange_. "Who the fuck're you?" She grumbled, looking me up and down. I saw him passed her, on the bed in his t-shirt and jeans.

I had to go. He had some blonde bitch here? I was _gone,_ man. All my instincts told me that. Thankfully, over the passed few years I had learned to stop _fucking_ listening to my instincts. "Move." I pushed her aside. He looked up at me, straight in the eyes. My hands were on my hips by then.

"Nike, who's _she_?" The bimbo demanded of me.

He looked down. "Get out." He said. She looked at me superiorly.

"He's talking to you, tramp." I glared at her.

"How do _you_ know?" She snarled back.

"Because if he ever talked to _me_ like that, I'd punch him in the face."

"Mollie, get out." He clarified. She snorted rudely, then stormed out the door, slamming it hard as I moved away. I glared at him. He didn't look up.

"You gonna look at me, _Nick_?" I folded my arms across my chest.

"I got a contract with a surfing company. I have a sponsor." He traced the lines in the sheets. I raised an eyebrow.

"Well whoopdie-fuckin-dee." I approached his bed slowly.

"I dropped out of school." He seemed really very captivated in the bed patterns. They weren't _that_ captivating, I knew that for a fact.

"I'm going to college."

"Good." He responded. He finally dared to glance up. "Times have changed, Max. I live here now- I..." he watched as I got closer and closer. I crawled up onto his bed on all fours, within four feet of him, two. "I..." he watched me, mouth parted some. I crawled up to his lying form, let my shoulders drop down, then kissed him. He kissed back. "Max..." he murmured, my forehead resting against mine, "I don't... I don't wanna get hurt again..."

"Emo-bitch," I whispered against his lips. I kissed him again as he rolled me onto his body. "What did 'Mollie' think of your wings?" I supported myself with a hand on either side near his head, pulling up and away from him.

"She thought they were hot." He stretched up to kiss me again. I pulled back one more time.

I laughed as he pulled me back down. "She had to be right about something."

-


End file.
